SOS! Students send 528 texts to their mothers a year
A survey commissioned by Costa Coffee has found that university students send an average of 528 text messages a year to their parents seeking help with everyday tasks, from money troubles to cooking queries. The findings suggest many young people struggle to become fully independent after leaving home, with 61 per cent of parents saying it feels as though their child never really left, though most parents said they welcomed the contact rather than resented it.
The study surveyed 2,000 parents whose children had left for university within the past five years, alongside 1,000 teenagers. The most common request was for money ("can you send me £20?"), followed by questions such as how to tell if chicken is cooked (40 per cent), how to read an electricity meter (28 per cent) and where to find a stopcock or water meter. A quarter of parents said their relationship with their child had not changed despite the shift in how they communicate, and eight in ten admitted they secretly enjoyed being asked for help. Psychologist Dr Ritika Suk Birah said such requests can remind parents they still hold an important role in their adult children's lives.
- Students text parents 528 times a year for help, study finds
- Top requests: money, cooking chicken, reading electricity meters
- 80% of parents secretly enjoy being asked for advice
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A Costa Coffee survey of 2,000 parents and 1,000 teenagers has looked at how much contact university students still have with their families after leaving home. It found students text their parents an average of 528 times a year, often to ask for help with basic tasks such as managing money, cooking or household jobs like reading a meter.
The research was carried out to explore how young people cope with independent living once they start university, a period traditionally seen as a step towards adulthood. Most requests were practical rather than emotional, with money the most common ask, followed by everyday queries such as checking if chicken is cooked properly. A psychologist quoted in the study, Dr Ritika Suk Birah, offers context on why parents might respond positively to being needed in this way.
The findings feed into a wider, long-running conversation about whether young adults today become self-sufficient later than previous generations, and how mobile phones have changed the nature of parent-child relationships during the transition to university life.
Both sides, in good faith
The strongest fair case each way — we don't pick a winner.
The case for
Frequent texting between students and parents can be seen as a marker of concern: some worry that constant recourse to a phone call for tasks like judging whether chicken is cooked or reading a meter suggests basic life skills are not being taught before young people leave home, and that instant digital access delays the development of independent problem-solving and resilience that living away from home has traditionally fostered. Advocates of this view argue that part of growing up is learning to cope with small uncertainties alone, and that always-available parental help, however well-meant, risks softening that learning curve.
The case against
Others would argue that these figures reflect a healthy, modern evolution of family relationships rather than a failure to launch: technology simply makes it easier to ask a quick, low-stakes question, and most parents say they enjoy being asked rather than feeling burdened by it. On this view, staying closely connected does not preclude independence, and a quarter of parents reporting no real change in the relationship suggests texting is simply replacing conversations that would once have happened by phone or letter, with psychologists noting it can offer reassurance and a continued sense of purpose for parents without undermining their children's growth.